Don't Know Where I'm Going single cover, showing an illustrated man happily walking along a path, with a giant hand drawing this path with a pencil, all in shades of blue

Don’t Know Where I’m Going

A few years ago, I was in a long-term relationship, studying engineering, and planning to work at camp for the summer. In quick succession, I felt like I was being asked to leave all 3 of those things. It was a scary prospect, leaving behind things that felt so certain & secure and stepping into totally unfamiliar terrain. I would have easily admitted that God is smarter & wiser than I am and that God’s plans would turn out better than mine — it seems obvious to say it. But it’s a whole different thing to take it seriously with my life.

When I’ve invested so much in a certain direction, what do I do when that direction changes? When my own plans fall apart, what else is left to stand on? Nothing but faith, I guess. Which was probably the point.

Eventually, I ended the relationship, turned down the camp job to go on a mission trip, and decided to quit engineering under the suspicion that I was being led into a music career. And I’m still in the midst of that last decision, watching it play out day-by-day.

Looking back, I sometimes wonder how confidently I can say that it was God telling me to do this or that. I’ve landed on “probably.” But at the very least, I figure that any choice I’ve made in an effort to do what is right and follow God more closely — that can’t be a mistake. 

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Lyrics

Don’t know where I’m going
I don’t choose the plan
I won’t walk it perfectly
But I’ll do what I can
Don’t know when I’ll get there
Don’t know what I’ll see
Don’t know where I’m going
But that’s OK with me

Don’t know where I’m going
Someone better does
Can’t say how much further
But I’m closer than I was
Maybe it’s tomorrow
Maybe it’s today
Don’t know where I’m going
But I know I’m on my way

Don’t know where I’m going
Following my prayers
Don’t know yet which roads I’ll get
But Yahweh put them there
Maybe greener pastures
Maybe stormy seas
Don’t know where I’m going
But I know who goes with me

They say I’m a grown up
No longer a child
They say I should plan my life
But that may take a while
I wish I could tell you
I wish I knew more
Don’t know where I’m going
But that’s what faith is for

Credits

Meg Johnson, Danny Robichaud, Gordon Flowerdew, Emma Flowerdew: background vocals
Mark: vocals, piano, trombones, euphonium, ocarina, programming, mixing

Written by Mark Amadeus Flowerdew. Recorded in Mark’s home in Halifax NS.
Mastered by Don Chapman. Cover illustration by Nathan Little, then Mark made it blue.
Single released July 16, 2021.

ISRC: CAREH2100005, ISWC: T3064621116, ©&℗ 2021 Mark Amadeus Flowerdew

Extras

More from Let’s Go:
 1. Let’s Go

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 2. Good Job

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 3. Lead The Way

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 4. Don’t Know Where I’m Going
 5. Break It Down

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 6. Welcome

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 8. Nope

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 9. You Are The One

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10. A Long Long Time

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